It seems like everyone I know has asked me about what happened. They want details, answers to all their [sometimes too personal] questions.
I'm not going to lie, I didn't LOVE or even like being bombarded with these questions from everyone who entered my room the day after my delivery.
But I dealt with it.
So here we go...
We decided to have an elective induction because of the fact that Aaron was leaving July 4th for LDAC [military training] and would be gone for a month. Adelei's due date was July 3rd.
Our doctor set our induction date for June 30th, so Aaron would get to be there for the birth and spend a little bit of time with her.
Thursday rolls around. We were at the hospital at 5 am. We sat in our freezing cold labor and delivery room for almost 3 hours before the doctor came in the break my water and start the pitocin. I was going to try to do this naturally. And I did try. But when I was 6 cm dilated the contractions were so strong, so close together I couldn't catch my breath. The pain was so awful I began shaking and vomiting. I decided I couldn't handle it anymore.
I got an epidural around 12 pm and life after that was amazing.
Once the pain subsided, I realized how starving I was. But I wasn't allowed to eat OR drink anything until after the delivery. I could have killed for a glass of water.
Finally, around 7 pm I had fully dilated and effaced. It was time to push.
And push I did. For an hour. The pain was so intense, it seemed as though the epidural just couldn't keep up.
After an hour of pushing, and an hour of my debbie downer nurse NOT motivating me, I called it quits. I was in so much pain and so frustrated with the way she was talking to me, that I told her I wanted to speak with the doctor.
He came in to check my progress and told me that it would be another 2 1/2 - 3 hours of pushing to get baby out. Not only was she really big, but her head was face up instead of face down.
I broke down. I knew the alternative, but that seemed like the best option for me. Another couple hours of pushing and STILL not knowing if that would do it really just made my decision for me.
So c-section it was.
I felt like such a failure. After being in labor for 12 hours and not being able to get my baby out on my own, I felt like I was taking the easy way out. But Aaron and Nanny convinced me that I was doing what was best for me and that I wasn't a failure because at least I tried.
After some kind of really really good medicine was pumped through my veins, we headed to the OR. I wasn't scared, just ready. I was awake through the entire thing and it took all I had not to cry when I heard her cry for the first time.
As the doctor was pulling her out, he said several times that she had a big head and that there was no way she was going to fit through my pelvis.
At that point I knew I made the right decision. Within minutes they were stitching me up. I fell asleep and woke up in the Labor and Delivery room.
I felt like I was in recovery for FOREVER before they finally brought me my baby.
Holding her for the first time was the most amazing feeling. As cliche as it is, you never know until it happens to you.
Although this experience wasn't my ideal experience, I wouldn't trade it for the world.
Adelei Jane
born June 30th, 2011 at 8:51 pm
8 lbs 7 oz, 20.5 in long
I'm not going to lie, I didn't LOVE or even like being bombarded with these questions from everyone who entered my room the day after my delivery.
But I dealt with it.
So here we go...
We decided to have an elective induction because of the fact that Aaron was leaving July 4th for LDAC [military training] and would be gone for a month. Adelei's due date was July 3rd.
Our doctor set our induction date for June 30th, so Aaron would get to be there for the birth and spend a little bit of time with her.
Thursday rolls around. We were at the hospital at 5 am. We sat in our freezing cold labor and delivery room for almost 3 hours before the doctor came in the break my water and start the pitocin. I was going to try to do this naturally. And I did try. But when I was 6 cm dilated the contractions were so strong, so close together I couldn't catch my breath. The pain was so awful I began shaking and vomiting. I decided I couldn't handle it anymore.
I got an epidural around 12 pm and life after that was amazing.
Once the pain subsided, I realized how starving I was. But I wasn't allowed to eat OR drink anything until after the delivery. I could have killed for a glass of water.
Finally, around 7 pm I had fully dilated and effaced. It was time to push.
And push I did. For an hour. The pain was so intense, it seemed as though the epidural just couldn't keep up.
After an hour of pushing, and an hour of my debbie downer nurse NOT motivating me, I called it quits. I was in so much pain and so frustrated with the way she was talking to me, that I told her I wanted to speak with the doctor.
He came in to check my progress and told me that it would be another 2 1/2 - 3 hours of pushing to get baby out. Not only was she really big, but her head was face up instead of face down.
I broke down. I knew the alternative, but that seemed like the best option for me. Another couple hours of pushing and STILL not knowing if that would do it really just made my decision for me.
So c-section it was.
I felt like such a failure. After being in labor for 12 hours and not being able to get my baby out on my own, I felt like I was taking the easy way out. But Aaron and Nanny convinced me that I was doing what was best for me and that I wasn't a failure because at least I tried.
After some kind of really really good medicine was pumped through my veins, we headed to the OR. I wasn't scared, just ready. I was awake through the entire thing and it took all I had not to cry when I heard her cry for the first time.
As the doctor was pulling her out, he said several times that she had a big head and that there was no way she was going to fit through my pelvis.
At that point I knew I made the right decision. Within minutes they were stitching me up. I fell asleep and woke up in the Labor and Delivery room.
I felt like I was in recovery for FOREVER before they finally brought me my baby.
Holding her for the first time was the most amazing feeling. As cliche as it is, you never know until it happens to you.
Although this experience wasn't my ideal experience, I wouldn't trade it for the world.
Adelei Jane
born June 30th, 2011 at 8:51 pm
8 lbs 7 oz, 20.5 in long
7 comments:
It might not have been ideal but, you are awesome for putting the welfare of your baby before your own and for that I know you are going to be an amazing mother.
Thanks so much for sharing your birth story!!
Congratulations... she is totally gorgeous!
I wanted to say to you what I told myself when Ollie was born.... his birth wasn't what I expected.... it wasn't pleasant or anything.... i just remember it as hard, horrifying and terrifying. I went into shock you see while pushing and I dont remember anything from them on.... I dont remember having him placed on my chest, or him on the baby table while a dr. waited for him to cry... I dont remember being stitched up. I can remember from 5am the next morning when he was brought to me from the nursery.... I don't even remember consenting to him going to the nursery.
It took me a while and some days I still feel bad about how his birth went, even though I know it isnt my fault. He was a suction, forceps and MASSIVE episiotomy delivery.
Ollie came out in the end and he was healthy and he is healthy to this day. I remind myself it doesnt matter how he got here... all that matters is that he got here safely and I was ok too.
I don't think many peoples births go how they expect... so many things can happen in the course of a delivery that something is bound to happen.
All that matters is she is here safe Jamie and she is GORGEOUS!!
Glad hubby got to be there too.
Aw...she's beautiful! Congratulations hon & I give you major props for trying to do it on your own. Honestly, I'd probably be asking for pain meds even before I got that hospital gown on haha.
She is so perfect! I love that expression on her face in the second picture.
I was the same way as you- going in with all intentions of doing it naturally, but pitocin kind of took that choice away from me! And it was sheer luck that I did not have a C section, because I pushed for 4 hours. So I'm glad you made the best choice for you and that she's here and looks so sweet!
Congratulations!
There is no such thing as failure when you are birthing a baby and you need to know that. You did an amazing job, you did the best you could, you made the best decisions, it just wasn't meant to be. And that's OK because you have a beautiful and healthy baby girl who is probably thrilled that you didn't try squeezing her head out. ;)
And honestly? Nobody has the ideal labor/delivery. SOMETHING unexpected happens. So you've got some stitches in your tummy. I had them from front to back- and I mean that in every sense of the word, girl. I can't even tell you how happy I am that you don't have to experience what is tearing a stitch of your backside at 2am while getting out of a rocking chair. Only to have it replaced (with added ones!) the next day with little to no meds. I'm envious, to say the least. :)
congratulations jamie!! she is so beautiful and precious :) you are a great mother for trying, and you did what was best for your child. what a cute little family you have now! i love that last picture haha
Thanks for sharing! I love reading birth stories. I can't imagine not being able to eat/drink during labor. This was one of the major factors in deciding for homebirth. What a sweet baby, and 8 lbs of her! Whoa, that little chubby face doesn't look like a newborn. Cute!!
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